Roslin Macdonald
About Author
August 18, 2020

15 Things You Should Give Up to be Happy

How to Find Happiness

Here is a list of 15 things, which, ifyou give up on them, will make your life a lot easier and much, muchhappier.  We hold on to so many thingsthat cause us a great deal of pain, stress and suffering – and instead ofletting them all go, instead of allowing ourselves to be stress free and happy– we cling on to them.  


1. Give up your need to always be right

There are so many of us who can’t standthe idea of being wrong – wanting to always be right – even at the risk ofending great relationships or causing a great deal of stress and pain, for usand for others. It’s just not worth it. Whenever you feel the ‘urgent’ need tojump into a fight over who is right and who is wrong, ask yourself thisquestion:

“Would I rather be right, or would Irather be kind?”  WayneDyer.

What difference will that make? Is yourego really that big?

Would I rather be right, or would Irather be kind?


2. Give up your need for control

Be willing to give up your need toalways control everything that happens to you and around you – situations,events, people, etc. Whether they are loved ones, coworkers, or just strangersyou meet on the street – just allow them to be. Allow everything and everyoneto be just as they are and you will see how much better will that make youfeel.

“By letting it go it all gets done. Theworld is won by those who let it go. But when you try and try. The world isbeyond winning.” Lao Tzu


3. Give up on blame

Give up on your need to blame others forwhat you have or don’t have, for what you feel or don’t feel. Stop giving yourpowers away and start taking responsibility for your life.

Allow everything and everyone to be justas they are.


4. Give up your self-defeating self-talk

Oh my. How many people are hurting themselves because of their negative,polluted and repetitive self-defeating mindset? Don’t believe everything that your mind is telling you – especially ifit’s negative and self-defeating.  Youare better than that.

“The mind is a superb instrument if usedrightly. Used wrongly, however, it becomes very destructive.” EckhartTolle 


5. Give up your limiting beliefs

Give up your limiting beliefs about whatyou can or cannot do, about what is possible or impossible. From now on, youare no longer going to allow your limiting beliefs to keep you stuck in thewrong place. Spread your wings and fly!

“A belief is not an idea held by themind, it is an idea that holds the mind.” Elly Roselle

Give up your limiting beliefs about whatyou can or cannot do.


6. Give up complaining

Give up your constant need to complainabout those many, many, maaany things – people, situations, events that makeyou unhappy, sad and depressed. Nobody can make you unhappy, no situation canmake you sad or miserable unless you allow it to. It’s not the situation thattriggers those feelings in you, but how you choose to look at it. Neverunderestimate the power of positive thinking.


7. Give up the luxury of criticism

Give up your need to criticise things,events or people that are different than you. We are all different, yet we areall the same. We all want to be happy, we all want to love and be loved and weall want to be understood. We all want something, and something is wished by usall.


8. Give up your need to impress others

Stop trying so hard to be something thatyou’re not just to make others like you. It doesn’t work this way. The momentyou stop trying so hard to be something that you’re not, the moment you takeoff all your masks, the moment you accept and embrace the real you, you willfind people will be drawn to you, effortlessly.

We are all different, yet we are all the same.


9. Give up your resistance to change

Change is good. Change will help youmove from A to B. Change will help you make improvements in your life and alsothe lives of those around you. Follow your bliss, embrace change – don’t resistit.

 “Follow your bliss and theuniverse will open doors for you where there were only walls.” JosephCampbell


10. Give up labels

Stop labeling those things, people orevents that you don’t understand as being weird or different, and try openingyour mind, little by little. Minds only work when open.

“The highest form of ignorance is whenyou reject something you don’t know anything about.” Wayne Dyer


11. Give up on your fears

Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’texist – you created it. It’s all in your mind. Correct the inside and theoutside will fall into place.

“The only thing we have to fear, is fearitself.” Franklin D. Roosevelt

Fear is just an illusion, it doesn’texist – you created it.


12. Give up your excuses

Send them packing and tell them they’refired. You no longer need them. A lot of times we limit ourselves because ofthe many excuses we use. Instead of growing and working on improving ourselvesand our lives, we get stuck, lying to ourselves, using all kind of excuses –excuses that 99.9% of the time are not even real.


13. Give up the past

I know, I know. It’s hard. Especiallywhen the past looks so much better than the present and the future looks sofrightening, but you have to take into consideration the fact that the presentmoment is all you have and all you will ever have. The past you are now longingfor – the past that you are now dreaming about – was ignored by you when it waspresent. Stop deluding yourself. Be present in everything you do and enjoylife. After all, life is a journey not a destination. Have a clear vision forthe future, prepare yourself, but always be present in the now.

Life is a journey not a destination.


14. Give up attachment

This is a concept that, for most of usis so hard to grasp and I have to tell you that it was for me too (it still is)but it’s not something impossible. You get better and better at it with timeand practice. The moment you detach yourself from all things (and that doesn’tmean you give up your love for them – because love and attachment have nothingto do with one another, attachment comes from a place of fear, while love… well,real love is pure, kind, and selfless, where there is love there can’t be fear,and because of that, attachment and love cannot coexist), you become sopeaceful, so tolerant, so kind, and so serene. You will get to a place where you will be able to understand all thingswithout even trying. A state beyond words.


15. Give up living your life to otherpeople’s expectations

Way too many people are living a lifethat is not theirs to live.  They livetheir lives according to what others think is best for them, they live theirlives according to what their parents think is best for them, to what theirfriends, their enemies and their teachers, their government and the media thinkis best for them.  They ignore their innervoice, that inner calling.  They are sobusy with pleasing everybody, with living up to other people’s expectations,that they lose control over their lives. They forget what makes them happy, what they want, what they need…. andeventually they forget about themselves.  You have one life – this oneright now – you must live it, own it, and especially don’t let other people’sopinions distract you from your path.


More Posts

You Might Also Like

Read More
Couples/Relationship Counselling

Couples Therapy and why it helps

How can I help? When was the last time someone asked you this question? And when was the last time you asked someone this question? If I were to ask you this question in the context of a relationship: how can I help you in your relationship? I’m curious what your response would be. I may not know your response but what I do know is that it is a valid response and there is a place you can receive that help.
Apr 26, 2024
Abby Frett
Read More
Nutrition & Mental Wellbeing

Nutrition, our bodies and our mental health

Research shows it is possible to improve our mental healththrough what we eat. It involves making conscious food choices that support ourbrain’s function and helps regulate our mood.
Apr 10, 2024
Siobhan Lindsay
Read More

Why is it important for men to learn about the menopause?

Menopause is a natural process that marks the end of a woman's reproductive years, typically occurring in her late 40s or early 50s. While menopause is often viewed as a women's issue, the impact of this significant life stage extends beyond the individual experiencing it. It is crucial for men to educate themselves about menopause and its effects, as this understanding can strengthen relationships, foster empathy, and promote overall well-being for both partners.
Apr 9, 2024
Despina Andreou